Read It ‘N’ Weep

   Well. Obviously one of several things has happened:
  • I’ve been abducted by the aliens that I’ve always known would come for me.
  • I’ve been enjoying the summer and have been practically living outside.
  • I’ve been hating the summer and hating life and have been curled up in a fetal position in the comfort and quiet of my own bedroom.
  • I’ve been hating these changes in spaces and have refused to use my brain a little bit and adapt to the updates.

   It’s a little bit of all of the above; execpt for the aliens…or?…

   Okay, I’ve got no real excuse. So just for my mom and my friends–I’m fine. I’m busy. Not really busy doing much of anything important, unless you count lounging about on MY KICKASS NEW SWING as important.

   Mia’s birthday is the day after tomorrow, and already the child has presents out the yin-yang. We plan on having just a nice, quiet little family cookout with cake and presents. That’s all she really cares about at this point in time anyway.

   I promised tidbits of the conversation I’d had with my husband about 2 weeks ago on the way home from the grown-up party. Without further ado…and I’ll let you guess who said what. (Or rather, which one of us had more to drink that night.)

"You know, baby, that’s why I liked you. You didn’t have a messed up grill. And you were REAL."

"Awww…you were real, too, baby. REAL HOT!"

"He he he he. You’re crazy. But no, seriously, baby. You were real. You were like a real person with a real heart."

(Sniff, tear.) "Really?"

"Damn right. Everybody else I dated…they were not real. They were hot, but they were not real."

"So what do you mean when you say ‘real’?"

"You know–REAL. And you were hot."

"And you couldn’t resist my charms."

"Actually you got on my nerves on our first date."

"You got on mine too."

"You started pissing me off."

"See?!! Our minds were already on the same wavelength!"


   And that just about puts an end to the intellegent part of the evening. Yeah, that’s as smart as it gets around here. But, hey. At least I’m real.

   Just for the space people–I know I’ve been a bad girl, but I think about each and every one of you:

  KM: Doing a baby dance for you in my fancy shoes. Sue: Praying for you and your family always. Psychomommytif: Girl, I need to write you a ticket cause you got FINE written all over you. Sherry sherry: Summer in the TEXAX/OK area is almost halfway over! We just have to make it through to October and the heat will slack off a little bit! Until then I’m having Island Dreams. Mikey: I’m withering away without my daily dose of confessions of love, man-style. Hope it’s going well. FreckledSasha: Okay, so has school kicked in again? What are you taking this semester? Nooner: Can’t wait to see what video you have this week–and where is our song? Princessdarcy: It’s been awhile. Did we ever get the house across the street burned to the ground? Get right on that if not. Lizzie: I like you because you normally write as little as I have been lately. Hope you’re doing great–getting ready for school?

  I know for a fact I’ve left out several people–my brain just quit on me. I’ll get the rest of the list another day and I PROMISE to read a little more…and probably write a little more too.


About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

10 responses to “Read It ‘N’ Weep

  • barnyardmama

    OH yeah, the intelligent conversation between two spouses–sheer genius.  I’m glad you’ve got some new shoes and that you’re happily enjoying summer.  Stick up some pics after Mia’s birthday. 

  • Sue

    Glad to know you are still alive!  Whew, thought maybe you melted in this God forsaken heat.  My baby turns 21 on Wednesday, so I’ll be cryin’ all week about how she’s grown and I’m old now.  Happy Birthday to Mia!  (Post pics!)  : ) Sue

  • Darcy

    Hey girl!
    That house is an ATRCOCITY!  I’ll take a pic of it for you… I AM a b it of a pyro though, so don’t give me any ideas….
    Glad you’re doing well!
    Love ya!

  • Michael

    Hey Toni…yep not feeling the luv from you lately…but that’s ok…you keep on swinging!
    I’m back in Canada…will have some exciting news to share maybe by the end of the week to fuel you girly girls into a frenzy!

  • K

    Welcome back to earth… LOL… seems like life is taking much better care of you… and Happy birthday to the wee one…. Mia will be one cute birthday girly girl….
    Ciao bella,

  • Alicia

    How can your brain quit on you when ALICIA is at the beginning of the alphebet????
    HUGS!!  :)

  • Sheryl-Ann

    Toni, you are CRAZY!  I am in California on vacation and you have me laughing my head off. I got SICK of the TX weather and jetted out to a place where the temps are more like in the islands.  Sad part is that I have to come back in a week (cry cry).  I know I will love TX again when the heat simmers down but for now, grrrrrrrrr!  Hope Mia had a fantastic birthday!

  • Michael

    Notice how Sherry goes to California …when I’m not there?!

  • Laura

    I thought for sure I would come by only to find no news… but I was wrong! Here you are! Glad to hear you are doing great. I know life gets in the way of blogging sometimes. Shit happens. Enjoy the rest of your summer and come back to see us when you feel like it!!

  • Josh

    Man…that is so real. Although I’m slightly confused…had either of you once dated a robot? Because I heard they don’t do well with rejection. And if I’m right (which I’m 100% sure I am not), this may fill in for the first reason for your absence, swapping aliens for one or more disgruntled former robot companions.

You must be logged in to post a comment.

%d bloggers like this: