Take Good Care of My Baby

  I made it all the way up until I saw the truck pull out of the driveway and zoom down the road.
  Then a tear.
  I played "Designer’s World". I played with Play-dough. I ate breakfast–Cocoa-Krispies! Surely that would be enough to keep any normal person in a good mood.
  But sure enough, 2 and a half hours after Cheyenne left this morning, I had my customary break-down. Tears, running mascara, snotty nose…handfuls of hair.
  Just kidding about the handfuls of hair.
  So far, Mia has been able to blissfully ignore me by setting up a Weeble Village in the living room. I carried on for about 5 minutes in the closet, blew my nose, and came back out. "Mommy’s happy!" she shouted.
  Now the worrying will set in–"Gee, he left in an awful hurry. I hope he’s not speeding the entire way there. And the weather? It’s supposed to rain…maybe even snow! What if they slide off road and are trapped for a week in a snowy ravine? I didn’t even pack the kid a cooler! What kind of mother am I?"
  Seriously, I didn’t even pack her a measly little PBJ. No bottled water, no baby cokes. What was I thinking this morning? I even forgot to send the blanket I laid out for her to sleep with in the car. And wait, Cheyenne! Did you remember to go to the bathroom? You know, you may want to stop somewhere and let her go again…she usually needs a lot time in the morning if you know what I mean. Don’t let her get too filled up on greasy drive-thru food–it does a number on her stomach after a while. And, please–hold the music featuring adult themes and language. She’s got a wonderful selection of teeny-bopper CD’s. "High School Musical" is a current favorite–you’ll love it. Which reminds me–no scary movies. No rated R, or even PG-13, really. She’s young and impressionable. In fact, since you don’t get that much time together, how about no movies at all? Use this time to talk. And don’t fill her head with dumb ideas and close-minded opinions. You do most of the listening. Ask her about her poems, see if she’ll play a song on her flute. Did you know she made first chair? Oh, man. I should’ve remembered to send her ball and glove. That might be something fun to do. But then, it might be too cold. Crap! I forgot to pack her scarf and mittens! Pick some up for her–and don’t let her outside without them, and she will try to sneak out naked-handed.
  Let her call me. I gave her a calling card with 2 million minutes on it. That ought to do it. If she needs to, she can call us collect. Mia’s gonna wonder where she is–she’s going to want to talk to her sister. The dogs–will they understand? How am I going to explain this to them?
  And how are we going to do this Christmas without Cheyenne? You know, you’ve totally wrecked our cozy little routine.
  I hope Cheyenne has a fabulous time. Take care of her. And I know you have to make up time, but please–keep the speeding down.

About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

7 responses to “Take Good Care of My Baby

  • Eden

    I was out blog walking and clicked over to your blog.  As a single Mom I can completely relate to this entry.  Nothing I can say will make you feel any better.  However, I can offer this.  Be patient, from what I can tell from reading through a few of your blogs I can tell that he isn’t a very active father.  Cheyenne will one day see this and soon choose to spend the important day with you and force him to wait for her on another day.  As hard as it is she needs you to do exactly as you are and encourage her relationship.  In later years when it is important and your relationship becomes one from Mother and young daughter, to Mother and Adult daughter she will respect you so much and know how hard it was for you to let her go.  I learned the hard way as my Mother kept me from my natural father on many occasions.  Although he was never very active in my life I remember wishing so badly as a young girl that he would call and want me for Christmas.  Later on I learned that my Mother refused to let me go.  Although I am past it now, when I first found out I was so disappointed in her as a person.  I saw what my father was in time, but I so wish that she would have let me find that out much sooner than I did, by allowing me to make my own decision on if to spend a holiday with him.  I know better than to do that for my own children now.  *hugs*

  • K

    Oh… I hope your holidays will be joyous and Chayenne will be in your hearts… at least I hope you get a call!!
    Just stoping in to wish you a wonderful Christmas and holiday season… many new adventures and continued successes in 2007!
    Ciao bella,

  • Eden

    I didn’t mean to make you cry, but I am glad it helped.  I hope you have a blessed wonderful Christmas!

  • TexasGirlJen

    Just swinging by my blog buds to say Merry Christmas!I hope Santa brings you a plus sign on that little stick! :)
    Just busy yourself with household to-do’s and Mia….. and the time will pass. My mom got sad when it was "dad’s year" too — which wasn’t often…… and I can promise you, she might have fun but it won’t be NEARLY as much fun as she has with you. Promise. Been there… take care.

  • Alicia

    Hi Toni!!
    I know I’ve been MIA but I wanted to stop in and wish you a VERY Merry Christmas!!  I hope you will feel better about Cheyenne being gone soon.  I know that wasn’t easy for you.
    HUGS!!  :)

  • Tiffany

    Goodness girl… you are really missing her!  I know it’s hard not to think about and it’s hard to try to explain a routine to them.  I had a hard time with my MIL when she would keep Baylee for us…. which doesn’t happen very often.  Try to enjoy Christmas even though Cheyenne won’t be with you guys!  I’m always here if you need to talk!

  • Sheryl-Ann

    Oh Toni, I know you must Cheyenne quite a bit, but she will call and she will miss you all just as much.  Hope you all have a Merry Christmas.  Blessings my dear friend.

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