Everybody and Everything

 
I’ve been a little missing in action these days as far as the blogworld goes–I guess that’s got something to do with having a baby and a 3-year-old and trying to keep a sanitary house while fitting activities and appointments and the occasional quick shower somewhere in those measly 24 hours I’m given each day. I have trouble keeping up with everyone else but me. Time is flying by insanely fast.
 
For instance, I can’t get my head around the fact that Merrick is a month old already. When did that happen? Wait, when did I even have him? I was sure that whole birthing thing was just a dream–thank goodness we have video proof. Tomorrow he gets his very first ultrasound followed by his very first X-ray. I did a little googling yesterday and found that the worst that could happen is that he would need surgery to basically open his skull back up. I don’t say that to make light of the situation, because I can’t even let myself imagine how awful it must be to watch your child go through such a major surgery. (Major props to Charlie’s mommy and Blair’s mommy–you guys, and your kids, are just amazing.) But, in that event, it’s a good thing we’re getting this done now–the earlier, the better, is what they say, so that the brain has room to grow normally. Some kids have facial deformities from this; my main worry is that it would affect his mental development, or his eyesight, or something. On the upside, after surgery, he would get to wear a kick-ass helmet for a year, and that would totally give him some serious street-cred with the kids at the playground. He would be so hardcore.
 
Right now I’m trying stay optimistic. There’s still no reason to worry. Merrick’s doctor will call us hopefully by this time next week to let us know how everything turned up. And if there’s a problem I hope I can be positive and calm and rational. I love my stinkin’ cute son and his messed-up noggin. Whenever I hold him I can’t help but gently pet and kiss those crooked little head bones. He’s most definitely out of that dazed and confused newborn stage and he’s starting to pay attention to the world around him. He turns his head to follow sounds and he intensely studies whatever he finds to look at. He’s genuinely smiled at me a few times and he laughs heartily in his sleep. His eyes are still blue as blue can be. He still eats every 2 hours or so, even at night, so I’m a little tired, but it’s obviously worth it. Everyone should have a baby to warm their heart like this.
 
Mia’s been a little more active, and a little more demanding, than usual. She’s so…wild. Maybe she needs the kick-ass helmet. But I tell ya, she loves her baby brother and hasn’t been even slightly jealous of him. She’s had her share of "brat" moments these past weeks, but that’s to be expected. I can handle her meltdowns, just so long as she fits in "I love you" and "you’re the best mommy in the whole world" a few times a day. Everyone needs a 3-year-old for the ego.
 
Cheyenne’s been a huge help, with the baby, yes, but with Mia for the most part. She’s constantly offering her assistance–with just about everything except changing diapers, but who could blame her for that? I just have to be careful not to allow her to take on too much, though it is tempting sometimes. I honestly don’t know how I’d make it out in public without her to keep everyone, including me, in line. If I forget something, she remembers. If I drop something, she picks it up. If Mia escapes, she’s on it. Everyone needs a 12-year-old for moral support.
 
Caleb’s had a tiny bit more luck lately with the job search. The broker thing was working out alright for the amount of effort he was putting into it, but even still, something with a salary and benefits would be even better for us. He’s got a formal interview this morning and a sort of informal interview this afternoon, plus a few more opportunities that have come up–and everything’s right here in Oklahoma City. It’s not that we’re not open to moving, but it would obvioulsy be easier to stay where we are.
 
Our garden is coming along nicely. We’ve got squash coming out the ass, and cucumbers, too, but I’m less excited about those. We’ve picked all the strawberries we’re going to get this season, and I think the blackberries have just about bit the dust. Our tomatoes are just getting started. Okra–I’m thinking about torching those plants in the dead of night just so I won’t have to smell Caleb pickling them. Oh, and we’ve got yummy onions. I eat them raw.
 
We went to church again last Sunday. I still get bored with all the singing and pastor’s emotional speeches, but I actually understood–and sort of enjoyed–the main message. I’m not totally comfortable yet–bad Baptist memories, I suppose. My skin crawling and my palms sweating and whatnot. But I owe it to my kids to keep trying. Maybe we’ll end up trying another church. Maybe it’s just a matter of giving myself some time and giving that place a good honest shot. I’ll get there.
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About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

5 responses to “Everybody and Everything

  • C.C.

    The latest pictures are adorable!!!!!
     
    Good luck tomorrow.  I’ll be thinking about you & the little guy.
     
    My father-in-law’s garden over-produced cucumbers and squash, too!!!!!  The cucumbers I am cool with (get it?  cool as a cucumber!), but the yellow squash gets old really quickly!!!

  • barnyardmama

    I’m glad you googled it.  I’ve seen children with that problem on the ‘net and it doesn’t seem to be medically threatening so much as a big surgery.  Surgery is, of course, frightening in the moment, but I’m glad you’re looking at it the way you should: could be worse.  But trust me, even though i know Charlie will have to have surgery again (shunts don’t last a lifetime), I dont’ like to think about it.  Cross that bridge when I come to it and all that.  And, see if my doctor will prescribe me a Valium (just one!).
     
    Good to stay on top of it because like you said, he needs room to let that magnificent brain of his grow. 
     
    Good luck with Merrick’s big day tomorrow.  I think the tests will be pretty easy on him.  They typically swaddle them at that age and they cry, but it’s over quick.  I’ll say a prayer for you guys and also for Caleb on his job hunt fun.
     
    KM

  • Bev

    I am sending positive thoughts and prayers your way for sweet Merrick, that all will be able to be taken care of.  He is such a cutie.  You are so fortunate to have such beautiful children.  How wonderful to have Cheyenne’s helpful hands and Mia to keep things "lively"!!  BTW….I LOVE your haircut!!  I think it’s cute!!
     
    You’ve got a LOT going on right now.  No wonder a month has flown by!!  Take care of yourself, my friend!
     
    Hugs to you!
     
    BBB

  • Hilary

    I LOVE your hair!  I think its super cute!  WOW!  And I can’t believe he’s a month old already!  If I’m shocked, I can’t imagine how you feel! :)  And I hope that everything goes well for Merrick and the tests! 

  • barnyardmama

    Let us know how it went today!  I’m nervous by-proxy.
     
    KM

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