Falling Behind and Losing It

Merrick is walking. He walks on carpet. He walks on tile. Without a helmet. When I’m least expecting it. He’s walking and he won’t stop. I’m afraid he’s going to kill himself or at the very least knock out his two front teeth. It’s cool. I mean, it’s not like I don’t want him to walk at all. But a 10-month-old does not have the balance and coordination of, say, a one-year old. I have mini-heart attacks all day long.
 
Mia’s a sassy little thing lately. It’s like she skipped ahead 8 years and everything I do or say sucks. It could be that she gets some of it from Cheyenne, but that doesn’t explain why she still thinks Caleb is the greatest man to ever walk the face of the earth. Some days I think I have the word LAME tattooed on my forehead.
 
I’m freaking out these days. I’m moody as hell and there’s no telling how I’ll feel from one minute to the next. I can’t finish the smallest tasks (probably because I’m either chasing after Merrick or comforting him after he’s already hurt himself.) I just can’t keep up with anything.
 
That said, I’m going to get my semi-weekly shower before Merrick wakes up.
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About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

3 responses to “Falling Behind and Losing It

  • miranda

    Well, I’m not sure it helps any, but I think you’re fucking amazing. Seriously. Being a mother is damn hard work and I’m in total awe that people can have more than one kid at a time. How the hell does that work???Hang in there. Merrick will be fine. Mia will grow out of it at some point and in the end she’s ALWAYS going to need her mama. Cheyenne is just growing up and Caleb shouldn’t take it personal. She’ll hug him again, I swear. I had a phase kinda like that when I was a teenager with my step dad. Take care, Toni!!!

  • Joell

    I LOVE love love the pics of Mia and the eyelash curler…she’s a girly girl after all! LOL. And Merrick is WALKING!! OMG. Both of mine were like 14 mos…Girlfriend!! Don’t hate me, but shall I ask a scary question….could you be pregnant??? Moody…distracted…just saying.

  • Bev

    Holy cow I can’t believe that Merrick is walking at that age. No wonder you are having a hard time!! Makes you wanna put them in bubble wrap doesn’t it?? The pics of Mia and the eyelash curlers reminds me of when I was little. I was fascinated with my oldest sister’s curlers. Amazing how even though things change….they kind of remain the same! Cheyenne is looking SO grown up! I can’t believe you got her to pose for a pic. She’s a beautiful girl and just doesn’t realize it.Hang in there my friend!! Hugs!Bev

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