Seriously, I’d kill for some caffeine.

Day 1 without coffee. Coincidentally, this is also the first time thus far in the pregnancy that I’ve stopped to ask "What have I done?" My kids are getting a jump on being ready for school–for the past 2 days they’ve been up at 6:00 a.m. And let me ask you this: is it normal for kids to leap out of bed at the crack of dawn, full-force and ready to play and eat and screech and go outside and swim and play in the mud?
I’m tired. And I’m starting to get a little freaked out. Seriously, what have I done? With 3 kids and 3 indoor dogs and what sometimes seems like 100 extra-curricular activities going on, to say that things are under control around here is a stretch. What made me think I could handle a new addition? It’s not like you can just lay an egg and hatch a 5-year old–although that does seem sort of brilliant. I think what I forgot was that I had to not only get pregnant, but be pregnant–for 9 whole months. Ordinarily I make a great pregnant chick. This time around, I’ve got a stark-raving lunatic two-year-old to chase around, and a dog that just won’t stop being a moron. Cheyenne and Mia both have schedules that never quit. How in the world am I going to keep up with all of this on 3 hours’ worth of sleep? How am I going to tenderly breastfeed a fragile little newborn when my son is jumping off the top of the fridge?
Okay, I exaggerate. I’m just exhausted by Merrick at the end of the day; I’m trying to imagine where he’ll be, acrobatically speaking, in 9 months, and jumping off the top of the fridge seems just about right.
I ran into friends of mine yesterday, and BLESS THEIR COLD VICIOUS HEARTS–all they could do was tease me about having twins: "You know, they say that the older you get, the higher your chances are for having multiples." Who says that to a mother of already 3? My friends do. Another woman I know grabs my hands and looks at me, wide-eyed: "What are you going to do?" Here’s me: "Oh, well, I figure we’ll get bunkbeds for little ones and stick the baby in the closet. We’ll think of something." Says she: "No, I meant, WHAT are you going to DO? I think I’d lose my MIND with that many kids."
I love my friends. I do. They’re all sweet, and they gave me a good laugh. I do know some gals that have 4 children–and you know what? They’re calmer than anyone else I know.
Is it because they’re taking pills? I doubt it. I’m pretty sure God has something to do with it. And I believe that since he blessed us with another little one, he’ll help me on those days that Caleb’s gone and the baby’s crying because it’s hungry, and Merrick’s crying because he rammed his head into the concrete, and Mia’s crying because I only have time to read 3 books and not 18, and Cheyenne’s grumpy for who knows what reason…God will pull me through.
Anyone want a dog?

About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

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