Fantasy Mother’s Day

What? Men get fantasy baseball.

I don’t consider myself a greedy person, unless it comes to something I want. This year, for Mother’s Day? The top thing on my wishlist is sleep. Maybe 7, 8 hours–consecutive hours–of sleep. 9 just seems frivolous.

I’ve taken the liberty of writing out some more of my deepest Mother’s Day desires, and if it sounds like I’m dropping hints, it’s because I am.

  • Sleep. Did I say that already? I guess maybe I did. Sleeping is awesome. Sleeping makes me feel happy. Sleeping is free.
  • Coffee. Like, a lot of coffee–flavored coffee, the really good kind, fully-caffeinated. And you know what? Let’s just go ahead and fantasize about whip cream (on the coffee of course!). Super hot coffee and maybe even in a brand new super-cute oversized latte mug, if you insist on buying anything at all $8-$12 at Target or Peir 1, not that I’ve thought this out or anything.
  • Every mother loves breakfast in bed. But seeing as this could possibly interfere with the whole sleep thing we talked about, we can skip breakfast and instead plan a nice brunch…that’s just sort of like a big breakfast. I’m down with french toast and bacon, but if you really want to wow me, you’ll bust out with some chocolate croissants and fresh blueberries. I’m just sayin.
  • Yeah, I’ll admit it. I love the zoo. Stupidest place in the world to go on Mother’s day. It’s crowded. It’s hot. But I do love animals.
  • So a crowded stinky zoo isn’t everyone’s idea of a good time. I’m also down with the park–and it’s 2 seconds away! And parks are even better with coffee!
  • And so I was thinking, after the park, we could go for a…wait for it…country drive! Windows down, radio up, kids passed out in the backseat–doesn’t get any better than that!
  • I guess I wouldn’t mind a bath…and a shower. A shower and a bath. Yes. Even though I’d feel compelled to shave my legs past my knees, it’d still be enjoyable.
  • Flowers:  I love me some flowers–I do! And I’ll take just about any kind–but whenever I go to the grocery store and I’ve blown almost our entire allotted food budget on, well, food, I pass the floral section and I absolutely lust over tulips. And sometimes irises, definitely sunflowers, and those cool little red coffee-bean filler flowers, and yellow roses. I. LOVE. FLOWERS.
  • I also love shoes. Whatever. You know what I love more? A clean house. That I didn’t have to clean.
  • And since Mother’s day is all about the construction-paper cards with a 7-legged glitter-glue cat on the front, that say “I Love you mom you are the best mom in the hole world and i will always be your little gril,” I’m really hoping I get one of those, too.
  • With my coffee.

About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

One response to “Fantasy Mother’s Day

  • Joell

    I am totally down with your fantasy mother’s day…right down to the whipped cream on my flavored coffee and taking a bath and shower in the same day! LOL Any of those items, including the full night of sleep would be awesome on ANY day right now!

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