I’m Losing My Mind…

…and my dogs are the only ones reaping any benefits. I fed them twice this morning and that’s not the first time it’s happened people.

I can’t walk from one room to the next–nay, from one 2ft-section of the room to the next–without forgetting what the hell I was supposed to be doing. I have to write myself little post-it notes everywhere to keep me on track, which doesn’t actually help much. I get seriously distracted at the drop of a hat. For example:

Things to do in the next 10 minutes:

  1. Get Merrick a cup of milk.
  2. Fold laundry.
  3. Call the school.
  4. Let the dogs out.
  5. Start the dishwasher.

Instead, I walk into the kitchen to get Merrick his drink, I see the coffee maker, and I pour myself a cup. Then I let the dogs out. Then I go to the bathroom. Then I sit down on the couch and stare at the pile of clean unfolded clothes and wonder what it was I was supposed to do next.

Thanksgiving is going to be a mess y’all. For the first time in 5…6 (?) years, we are having some family come in for this holiday. The thought of someone witnessing the spectacle of us running around trying to cook a turkey and a million other things? My brain is about to explode just thinking about it.

Add in this hefty list of crap to get done before then:

  • make up thanksgiving menu and go grocery shopping
  • pay the bills
  • clean the house from top to bottom over and over because the cleaning becomes obsolete after 24 hours
  • finish the bathroom re-do
  • find some sort of thanksgiving decoration and resist the urge to pull out my junk-ton of christmas ornaments and hang them from branches that hang from the ceiling
  • clean out the garage and get ready for community recycle day
  • finish a painting and ship it
  • start another painting and finish it in less than 2 weeks
  • work on more wooden signs and finish and deliver them
  • deliver wreaths that have been claimed
  • spend my hard-earned artist money on Chick-fil-A, socks, and underwear for the kids, plus Smokey’s stupid vet bill
  • christmas shop for Florida people presents
  • buy christmas cards and think about doing them early but save them until December 31st
  • have a heart attack
  • install coffee dispensers throughout the house
  • drink germ-x and get everyone healthy
  • remember to bathe and feed the children
  • remember to bathe and feed myself

Omg, that last one? MIND. BLOWN.

What will probably happen is that none of that will get done because I’ll just listen to Fat Albert cartoons while I mindlessly sweep doghair from the living room floor over and over and over and forget to send my kids to school.




About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

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