Red Dog: My Short Review

I don’t always cry over a movie, but when I do, I also want to pet my dog while eating a vegemite sandwich. Here are the small handful of movie moments that are guaranteed to make me cry, everytime, always:

  • Harry and the Hendersons: obviously the part where well-meaning George Hen punches Bigfoot in the face, gangnam style.
  • An American Tail: the part where Fievel–bless his pea-pickin’ heart–is reunited with his family…and also a cat, a prissy Aristocratic mouse lady, and a perpetually hammered rodent-mayor. On a hat. Under some kind of drainpipe spewing out fascinatingly clear, sparkling water.
  • Homeward Bound, The Incredible Journey: the scene where Shadow has a death wish and just gives up.
  • Marley and Me: If you don’t cry at least twice during this movie, you are a stone-cold cyborg incapable of feeling; and if you don’t love this movie, I cannot be your friend.
  • Hachi: The part where Richard Gere dies. And then the part where Hachi dies and dead Richard Gere is waiting for him on the train tracks. Oh my emotional stars.

And now, after an entire weekend of trying to laze-away all our illnesses with mass quantities of chicken soup and Netflix, I will present to you the newest addition to Toni’s No-Fail Cryfest Movie List: Red Dog.

The most glorious piece of cinematic brilliance known to man. So scrumptroulescent, I can barely move.

Now this is a heart-warming movie, based on a true story of a dog who actually seemed more brownish than anything, except he probably had a permanent coat of red dirt on him. It is rated PG although there were a couple parts in it that, while they seemed to fly right over Mia’s head, Caleb and I blushed over. (There’s a scene where this Italian guy describes the boobs of the women in his hometown.)

General idea: A dog somehow winds up in this BFE mining town in Australia. All the mining people just love him and he spends a lot of time in the bars, bonding with everyone (but with no one person in particular more than the other). Red Dog adopts Josh Lucas as his master, and Josh Lucas adopts a suprisingly normal-looking Rachel Taylor as his girlfriend, and life for the trio is good.

Until Josh Lucas has an unfortunate run-in with a kangaroo.

And that’s all I’m going to say about that.

Red Dog wanders the Australian countryside, hitch-hiking, fighting with cats, and just generally being bad-ass. He even goes to Japan. He becomes legendary. Everyone loves him.

And of course then, as in every good dog movie, he dies.

Did you need a spoiler alert for that? Most likely not. Unless you know nothing about dog movies–in which case you’re a loser; which is not probable, since only winners read my blog.

For the most part, this movie is sweet–just dang sweet. And dang sad. Plus I kind of want to move to Australia now. And it probably goes without saying that my own 3 dogs have had a lot of treats today.

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About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

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