That Time I Thought I was Okay With My Daughter Growing Up.

I’m tired.


I hear bath water running somewhere in the house and I’m not really sure I want to know what’s going on back there. Merrick got a plastic fishing pole with plastic fish so I have a feeling it’s nothing too maniacal.

…giggling. That can’t be good.

Mia is one can of crazy these days, bless her heart. Just one big clumsy ball of emotion, running into everything and tripping over thin air…and then crying about it until she’s completely depleted every ounce of water in her body. I’m reminded of a time when Cheyenne acted the exact same way…and I’m genuinely scared about the next 5 to 10 years.

Cheyenne has been busy busy busy ever since she got back from Maryland. She really did have a wonderful visit with her dad this summer. Sure, she came home with a third hole in her ear and a belly button ring–2 things I think she assumed that Caleb and I would say no to–but we figured she’d do something to assert her independence while she was away, and quite frankly we didn’t care as much as she thought we would.

Sidenote: Her budding sense of rebellion? As a good friend of mine pointed out to me: she gets it honest.

Waaaaay honest.

She will do great things.

It was so good for her to really get the quality time she’s been craving with her father and this side of the family. Her little brother and sister are adorable and they look so insanely similar to Cheyenne when she was little. Her stepmother is sweet and nice and smart–a good friend and an awesome role model and I’m thankful that she is a big part of my daughter’s life.

She gushed about the trip. Just gushed. But senior year calls: Cheyenne had exactly 1 day after getting off the plane in Oklahoma before band camp started. And when she’s not playing her flute, she’s got her head stuck in the clouds with her phone and texting and her new iPod with internet access. She’s gone to sleepovers and movies with her friends. We have gotten a little time to talk–one night after band camp at 11:00 p.m.–and talk we did. For hours. It was fantastic. Yesterday I let her drive home from church and I didn’t need to take tranquilizers when we arrived safely at the house. She’s ready for her driver’s license–and we’re ready for her to have it.

Even more unnerving than Cheyenne behind the wheel of a car is Cheyenne going off to college to a far away state like West Virginia. She’s bound and determined and chomping at the bit to get out of Oklahoma if it kills her–onto something new and bold and unexpected–and for her, all these things apparently lie in the eastern portion of the country. Caleb and I are readying ourselves: it’s okay, people. We’ll embrace it. We’re already talking about renting U-Haul and driving her out there, perhaps making a summer family vacation out of it if we have to. West Virginia is beautiful. There’s hiking and fishing and white-water rafting and country drives. I have to say, there are worse places Cheyenne could be looking at.

This is life with a teenager…more specifically, this is life with a senior in high school. It’s fun and scary and bittersweet and I miss her already, but the more time goes on, the more excited I am for her future.


About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

One response to “That Time I Thought I was Okay With My Daughter Growing Up.

  • tisha

    Wow!!! Hard to believe she is a senior already. The years fly by so fast…
    Seems like just a few months ago we were all welcoming her in to the world and our group of crazy friends!

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