True Love

This is my son: “Mom. Do you think we could pick up some flowers and chocolates today?”

Me (just in complete adoration of my son who has obviously been listening to his mother when it comes to treatin the ladies right): “I suppose so. Who are you giving them to if you don’t mind me asking?” (Knowing smile, wink wink.)

Him: “I’m going to give them to Ty’s girlfriend. Well, she’s not his girlfriend yet–he tried to catch her today at recess but she says she doesn’t like him but I think she’s just messing with his heart because she said she liked another boy–but I told him I would hook him up with some flowers and candy to give to her and then she’d probably be his girlfriend.”

Me:
Me:
Me:
Me: “Son ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW? I am not giving you flowers to give to some OTHER kid’s not-even girlfriend! Money does not just flow out of my ears, you know! Geez Louise, I’m not even getting flowers and chocolate for Valentine’s Day!”

Him: “But Mooooom! I promised! I’m his wingman!”

Me: “You do not know what a wingman is!”

Him: “I know what a wingman is! It’s a buddy that makes sure you get a pretty girlfriend, not a ugly one.”

Me:
Me:
Me:

Him: “I will pay for all of it with my own money.”

Me: “This ain’t college! You boys don’t even need girlfriends.”

Him: “Well, the flower was for his girlfriend but me and Ty were gonna eat the candy.”

Me: “What the…?”

Him: “Can I just get candy, then?”

Mia: “If he gets candy, then I do too!”

Me: “Dang it, children!”

Merrick:
Mia:

Me: “Sour Patch Kids after school today.”

Mia: “Thank you Mommy! We’ll each give you one!”

Me: “Nah, that’s okay. I don’t like them.”

Merrick: “Why don’t you buy yourself
some m&ms?”

Mia: “Yeah, it’ll be your Valentine’s Day present from us.”

Merrick: “Girls do need candy on Valentine’s Day.”

So to recap, Merrick is a champion of true love, both of my children are entirely too focused on candy, and momma’s getting herself some m&ms thanks to the generosity of my kids–and because it’s only right. Happy early Valentine’s Day, everybody.

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About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

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