True Story

My writing had been suckish lately, and by suckish I of course mean non-existent. It’s probably for your good and the good of all God’s people, since my musings range from simple hobby farm life, to wanting only sleep, in and out of Jesus territory, and back to alien invasions and/or teaching preschool. My brain is too chaotic for organized blogging.

I have way too much on my mind. The call to write, though, has never gone away, and I feel more moved than ever to share the things I’ve been learning; but I hesitate. I second-guess myself constantly. I am so cautious about what I post and how I word it, that for the past six months or so, I’ve found it hard write at all.

It’s never been my goal to make people mad with what I blog about, but it happens. Here’s the thing of it: I write how I talk, and I communicate primarily in hyperbole. For example: “My chickens are the worst chickens in the entire green wide world. Satan himself carved them out of feathers and sent them marching to my door in order to torment me all the days of my life; they peck my fingers and scratch my arms and poop out flies and their eyes look like pools of hell’s poison and I shall hate these chickens forever until they die, which won’t be long because I am going to kill them and eat their fried bodies.”

(That actually happens to all be true.)

Here’s another thing of it: I’m not into mouth poetry and fancy Christian jargon and voskamp-like vibes. Because the people God tells me to write to? Would run to the nearest pencil and shove it through their faces.

(Also true.)

So I have some decisions to decide and some changes to change should I continue with writing down my heart on the Internet.

I’m not brave, I just subconsciously toy with rebellion. I’m not honest, I’m just too impatient and distracted to use a filter. I’m not cool, and I’m not smart. But I do try to encourage people, and to make them laugh, and to inspire them to look a little further for themselves into who Jesus really is. And so if God can accomplish those things with words that I type, then, well….

I will keep working on perfecting my hyperboles.



About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

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