May, the 2016 countrified version.

Hi, my name is Toni, and I do not blog in May. Or think straight, or remember important things–or care about anything in particular except for getting through the month. Which turns out to be unfortunate for my May babies, cause birthday parties are not the stoff of eighty different sports’ schedules.

It is spring, or as we here in Oklahoma know it, “one big fat long never-ending tornado watch”. Last night a giant fly flew over my house and gave birth to a billion thousand babies all over my roof. A gnat just chewed my ear off. There’s a plague of teensy crickets taking up residency in my closet. My dogs smell like cow manure. My chickens (Moto-Moto, Eleanor, Daryl, Phillip, and Felicia; and yes, we named Felicia ‘Felicia’ for the sole purpose of being able to legitimately say ‘Bye Felicia!’ upon leaving the house.) are all freaking roosters, and they’re learning how to crow. The day is fast approaching where this Florida girl is going to actually use a machete to chop off a chicken’s head.

…I’m just not sure how to even deal with that right now, except to say, bye Felicia!

May is hard. I’ve been without The Walking Dead for three months and I’ll be deprived of it for five more months. I’m pretty convinced that Glenn is a goner; this tears me up inside. Rick and Michonne; Carol and Morgan. So many feelings. Personally my favorite team rn is Gabriel and Judith. So many feelings. The tears, all the glistening tears.

My wonderful, wonderful first year  teaching cutie-pie preschoolers is coming to a close, and I’m so pumped to say that I’ve been allowed to come back next year. They like me, they really like me! This is exhilarating and also shocking news, and I can’t wait til August.

I mean, I can wait. Because, SUMMER–and the end of May is just around the corner. I’m ready for second breakfasts, “Jem” on repeat, and feeding ducks in my pajamas. The thought alone is enough to get me through the week.


About Toni

Mom. Wife. Artist. I take care of the kids and pretend to clean sometimes. I can cook spagetti and I have never been arrested. View all posts by Toni

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